Letter for Dawn

Hey Dawn,
I just wanted to ask you, but... it's a mistake... you wouldn't know...

When will I stop being so worthless? When will I love myself enough to feel good about my capacities? When will I be good enough to do what I have to do? What life awaits me, If I can't find the right road? Why am I so useless?

I hate myself! I hate me because I can't do anything on my own. I hate me for writting this and not being able to to give it to you in person. I hate me for crying over nothing and over everything. I hate me for crying now, as I write this.

I just wanted to ask you, but... you wouldn't know... I AM the mistake.

Love you,
Ana Meza

P.S Don't worry about me... you have your own problems.

Language Class!!!

Learning a language can be a lot of fun but when you are trying to learn three different languages at the same time it can get prety confusing. Especially if two languages that you are trying to learn are similar. Even when the languages don't really exist in real life, they can be hard to learn because they are actual new words that you have to learn and new sentence structures. the reason I am saying this is because I am learning Japanese wich is a real language everyone should know that, right? Anyway I am not only learning that but also I am learning a language that was completely made up by my cousin who loves art. lol It's true though this language is very similar to Japanese and since I am studying Japanese I often get confused with some of the words. But like I said I like learning these new things and well I see it as a challange. ^_^

what the...

I'm not sure why I'm writting this here but I just wanted to let the world know that I feel really lonely. I'm always feeling like this but I don't know why or what can I do to not feel like this. I wrote a poem a while back and it's name was Useless I lost it unfortunetly but I remember that I said that many of the things that I do are wrong or at least tha's what others say... no names mentioned... I cant do anything for myself and I know that that is one of the things that really make me useless. I wish I could Vanish from the world forever and maybe like that the world would be better off. I HATE myself and I hate being sad but I can't help it.

I wish I was beautiful like Her...

Has BLOGGER been FORGOTTEN!!!

I'm wondering why I don't use blogger that much anymore. NO, it hasn't been forgotten but there are so many websites out there to try out that sometimes it's hard to remember that we have others. Blogger is awesome and i love it because I can express my feelings and anyone can give opinions on what they think. I don't usually get visitors and when i do theyu don't leave comments so... I usually use blogger more of like a journal and hey t's cool I like that way. I like using Blogger alot and I don't think I would forget it. Any one who reads this please give Blogger a try it's really nice.

Life is not always bad!

Recently I've experienced a lot of depression attacks, and I hate them they bring me and my whole world down and then I feel bad for myself and then I cry. Most of the time I don't know why I am crying but I sit there and keep on crying. Two days ago, I took a walk in the middle of the night and I looked at the stars, I wasn't sure what I was looking for but I was there staring at the sky. I realized after a while of just walking outside that the stars looked extremely pretty and that i just couldn't stop staring at them. And then it struck me. I knew then that there was something beautiful all the time and that it was there to make the hard times seem less harsh. Last night I took a walk outside in the middle of the night, and once again the stars where there looking pretty like they did the day before. I know that when I feel bad I can look at the stars and feel that there are things to life that aren't always bad. And that in fact some things are beautiful in there natural way.

HYDE

College...

why is going to college such a complicated situation for illegal residents of the united states? Getting in is easy but then you have to pay ten times the amount of money a regular U.S. citizen would, per unit. and that is with out counting materials. those are extra. what a pain. No wonder many immigrants don't finish college. most of the time we hear that the U.S. is the land of opportunity and justice for all, the truth i would have to say it's that the U.S is the land of opportunity and freedom for all U.S. citizens. only legal aliens... what ever I am an imigrant but i won't give up on college until i have tried every single possible choice. i want to be a successful woman and I know that in order to become one I can't give up...EVER!!!!!!!!!!!